It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a man who lives in your average boisterous household, must be in want of a man cave. It allows him to peel away when the going gets tough, and retreat to the peaceful surroundings of his haven. Whether his partner is aiming the crockery at the back of his head or the children are tearing strips off each other, it gives him the space to regroup. ‘Ah me-time at last,’ he thinks, sinking into his well-worn armchair and ratcheting up the music to drown out the din from his home-sweet-home.
When his wife’s book club descends just as he’s settling in to watch Top Gear, he can beat a hasty retreat and power up his monster TV faster than it takes Stiggy to do a lap. Or when his friends drop by with craft beers only to be met with a house full of pre-teens on a sleepover, once again the man cave beckons.
Many men dream of having such a hideout but for most, dreaming is as far as it goes. They fail to take action, which is a pity because it doesn’t take a lottery win to make it happen. It’s simpler than it seems and well worth the investment for him – and his significant other.
If you’ve been there, you’ll know that one of the main reasons why you still don’t have a man cave is because it’s so hard to get your nearest and dearest to agree. What’s so special about you that you need a dedicated space just for you? They might not come right out and say it but if you’re meeting resistance, that’s probably what they’re thinking. Here’s where we come to the rescue with reasons to convince your significant other to get behind the man cave of your dreams.
A Place to Unwind
At the end of a hard day, you want to curl up in a relaxing environment. You might want to switch off by watching your favourite television show (which she hates), play video games or your bass guitar.
This is the most popular reason for wanting a man cave. Yes, of course it’s great to spend time with your partner and deconstruct the day, but sometimes you need to be alone, especially after dealing with people all day. This timeout will help you to become less irritable, so everyone wins.
As life gets more and more busy, many people lose touch with the things that make them happy, the things they used to enjoy. Whether that’s painting model airplanes or taking old radios apart, a man cave allows you to proudly display your passions and provides the space to do ‘fun work’ without getting in everyone’s way.
Some of these activities will generate quite a mess, so having a place to take it ‘off-site’ will please your other half no end when she realises what’s involved. Out of sight, out of mind! You won’t feel under pressure to clean up and tidy everything away; you can just pick up where you left off. Your man cave, your rules!
The main point of having a man cave is that your significant other is not allowed in. Whether they’re being nosey or just wondering where all the kitchen mugs have gone, entry is by invitation only. The exception, of course, is when you decide to have a party. If it’s a decent-sized man cave, it can be the ideal place to entertain – and you don’t have to face the morning-after chaos until you’re good and ready.
A man cave doesn’t have to be small and confined either. It can be as roomy as the yardage allows, with ample space for games such as pool or darts. You can even kit it out with a bar. Think tacky if you like, just as long as you and your pals feel right at home.
And the cherry on the cake? Your corner of paradise can increase the value of your home. That’s right! It can make it easier to sell. After all, what prospective buyer can resist the lure of a ready-made man cave at the back of his dream home.
Glam up the Garage
If you are convinced you need a man cave but are concerned about where exactly it might go, it’s time to get creative. Many people won’t have enough room in their gardens for a dedicated man cave but there’s always the garage.
What’s the point in using this space to park your car – it’ll be just as happy on the street – or to dump the junk you have accumulated over the years. Your garage can be quickly and easily turned into a man cave.
This previously wasted space can be transformed into a place that stands out. And as if to prove the point, you’ll find businesses that specialise in turning garages into a gym or other space that is functional and inviting – and all yours.
Rich Tea and Empathy
When you want a man cave but your significant other is having none of it, you’ll need to put yourself in her shoes. What may be clear and compelling reasons to you, could well look shady from where she’s sitting.
It might seem as if you don’t want to spend time with her or the rest of the family, that you are getting involved with time wasting – or worse, nefarious – activities, putting your friends first and trying to escape your responsibilities or regain your lost youth. In short, she may well be thinking mid-life crisis, minus the red Ferrari.
You need to sit her down – a cup of tea wouldn’t go amiss – and spell out the exact reasons why you want your man cave and explain that you have no ulterior motives. This will help quell her doubts and bring her around. Lay out the promise of a happy man, increased house value, and a tidy house. How could she possibly say no!
Clearly you could spend any amount of money building and kitting out your man cave, but if you’re on a tight budget, it’s still do-able. You really don’t need to spend much at all.
The main component of a man cave is a space that allows you to indulge in your hobbies, uninterrupted, whether that means having a television and a gaming console, a set of paints or just a comfy sofa and a battered guitar.
You don’t need anything fancy; ultimately, all you want is a place where you can go and shut out the world until you’re ready to face it again.
Once you have allayed their fears and concerns, they’ll be more likely to come ‘round. Emphasise that it will be mutually beneficial by pointing out all the fringe benefits coming their way.
A man cave can be positive for your relationship. See it as an oasis where you can recharge your batteries and emerge with a pep in your step. Airlines never tire of telling us to put on our own oxygen masks before attempting to help those around us. Think of your man cave as your own personal oxygen mask. Without it, you’re no use to anyone. Who can argue with that.